The Most Confusing Bathroom Ever II

Ladies and Gentlemen, allow me to interpret a second passage from the Book of Confusing Bathrooms.

Across Europe, my travel buddy B and I found it hilariously entertaining to see how signs in one language often had much shorter English translations underneath them. You always got the feeling that they were forgetting to tell us non-native speakers something IMPORTANT, like translating a half page of French down to "Don't turn toilet light on" should also be followed by "Oh yeah, this toilet has a habit of backing up in the middle of the night and covering your floor with a solid inch of last night's curry-and-kebab-explosive-diarrhoea shit. Welcome to France, you ENGLISH PIG DOGS!"

Luckily, our first experience was a chance encounter with a sign that was about seven lines long, stuck on (of all things) a toilet door in the train. We assumed the sign was explaining that the toilet didn't work, how the weather was at home, how the sign writer had a small wart on his big toe that was looking slightly shonky, and that you shouldn't trust a woman who holds up a sign saying Suck For A Buck. In English, this translated down to "This toilet don't work." I wisely chose to do my twosie in another toilet.

But my favourite toilet sign, and one which I took a photo of, was the sign placed on a toilet button underneath an internet cafe in Vienna. I think the sign explains itself fairly well, although I'm not exactly sure whether it's offering advice for what to do DURING your dookie-session, or AFTER. I leave it open to your interpretation.