That Friend

In life you will always meet people who just seem to fail at everything, especially what they care about the most. Now my friend only cares about getting laid or being in a relationship. These are the tales of Rick, I honestly wonder if I will ever meet another human being who fails as much. Rick is the little train that couldn't but he chugs along anyway. If you take anything from the tales of Rick let it be that trying harder does not necessarily increase your chances of success.

Rick has had several sexual relationships spanning for anywhere from weeks to over a year, so he has not always failed when it comes to women. However most people do feel that some of his previous relationships started under questionable circumstances. It has only been over the past year or so that he has hit this dry spell and consequently is drifting lower and lower into insanity. It must be understood that Rick is the kind of person who uses his partner to carry all of his emotional baggage and without a relationship or at least sex for a quick self-esteem boost he becomes increasingly desperate.

Jane

Jane is a good friend of one of our best chick friends, Nicole. Rick had chatted up a chick on the plane this week and gotten her number, then gone out on a date with a different girl who he basically tried to molest in the cinema and then she told him she just wanted to be friends. After this he went back to the girl from the plane who had actually given him a wrong number. Guess he isn't as smooth as he thinks. After this he went to Jane nearing the end of the week and told her that he had really been hoping to go out to dinner on Saturday night but his plans had fallen through. So he asks Jane to go with him as a friend so that he could still use his dinner reservation and wouldn't feel lonely....he convinced her by saying "keep in mind that if you say no you will be the third girl to reject me this week". Now if that isn't a smooth con I don't know what is.

On the night of this dinner date I was at a 21st with the rest of the boys. Rick later attended with Jane in tow and it is important to note that all the information was not made available to us until after the party. However I will try to tell this in chronological order. Let us begin with Rick picking up Jane.

Rick arrived at Jane's house to drive her to dinner, he spoke with her parents a bit while she finished getting ready, he felt they liked him and things were going well. We believe they most likely disliked him and felt he was a complete creep. After Jane was ready they went out to the car, upon opening the door she found a rose left for her on the passenger seat. Rick then proceeded to ask her for a kiss. Jane went to oblige with a kiss on the cheek and he turned his head at the last moment to steal a proper one. Quite smooth from a serial rapists perspective I guess.

On to dinner where we were informed that Rick made many lame jokes and boring conversation and got Jane as drunk as he possibly could. A walk followed dinner where Rick asked for hugs and kisses as often as he could. We are unsure if he got them or not. Then they joined us at the party, to us at the party they appeared to be getting on fabulously, we did not know how to take this at first until later when I was able to speak to Jane without the singing freak hovering over her. Jane seemed concerned that Rick was after a lot more than just friendship out of this dinner and questioned me on whether or not everything would be ok. To which I honestly told her that when taking her home he would either try to convince her to go back to his place or let him stay at hers.

The initial panic overcome Jane began to question me on what to do and I offered her two options. Get a lift with me in the morning as I was too inebriated to drive at that time or be honest with Rick, tell him that she wasn't interested and to back off. Rick will not take subtle hints. He will blatantly ignore them in the hope that he can take advantage of someone who is too polite to say no. Jane told me she couldn't be that harsh but I made it clear it was her only choice. During our conversation Rick hovered around continually trying to eaves drop and pressuring Jane that it was time to leave. The best parting advice Drew and I could give to her was "No means no".

We were later informed that on the ride back to her place Rick tried to cool it down a bit, realising that he was going to fast and thinking of securing a second date by doing all that he could to seem like a nice kind of guy that a chick should want to see again. In Rick's version he got a vague promise of a second date and a makeout session in the car...Jane's version of events is somewhat different. In Jane's version there was no makeout session and Rick laid on a heap of crap about being really tired and how he probably shouldn't drive home like that and Jane had to get her sister to come down and get rid of him because he simply would not leave.

Since then Rick basically stalked her for a few weeks, showing up when she was shopping with her mother, leaving countless messages and calls on her phone, finding out her work and uni timetables and then messaging her just after she finished up asking her to go somewhere. Now it is also important to note that while basically stalking this poor girl Rick still continued to try to hook up with any chick he would meet, this man is so sex depraved that even when he thinks he has one on the line he’s still looking for more and is completely unwilling to let one go.

If you have read this and saw many similarities between yourself and Rick you should seriously consider seeking help, we have tried to help our friend but he refuses to accept that he is a fuckup. We owe it to women out there to tell his tales and to warn them of the real dangers, you could get raped any day of the week, or stalked or sexually harassed at work, but it would never prepare you for Rick. In a few years I honestly do see him becoming all of those things and more.